I Refuse To Beg
by Strgrl4eva
Summary: You’re so silly and conceited. You drive me nuts sometimes. You’ve never been the smart one so I shouldn’t expect much. But for some reason I do. For some reason you keep me up late at night just thinking about you. Thinking about what we could be.oneshot


_Ok, very short one shot...absolutely nothing special... what do you think? Does_ it suck? XD I'm nervous because its first person... lol

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Do you like me?

I stop and stare whenever you walk by… my heart practically aches for you. For you to give me some kind of notice… for you to look at me and see what I see when I look at you… For you to stop looking at other girls and realize that all you've ever wanted is standing right in front of you.

You're so silly and conceited. You drive me nuts sometimes. You've never been the smart one so I shouldn't expect much. But for some reason I do. For some reason you keep me up late at night just thinking about you. Thinking about what we could be.

I have all these stupid fantasies where we're holding hands and kissing under the stars like some gushy romantic comedy. There's one where you bring me this huge bouquet of flowers for Valentine's Day and tell me you're in love with me… and I'm so surprised I scream at you and slam the door in your face, assuming it's a joke.

Speaking of jokes…

I love walking with you and listening to your stupid jokes. And sometimes I think I want to impress you so I laugh at them even though no one else does… and I smile at you from across the hallway… and I flutter my eyelashes and wink at you… but then… when I think you realize what I'm trying to tell you… You get this weird look on your face and ask if I'm ok or if there's something wrong with my eyes and I want to scream.

I know boys have always been slow the uptake but why don't you get it? Why don't you get what I'm silently trying to tell you… why don't you get why I don't mind making a fool out of myself in front of you.

What do I have to do to get you to see me?

As more than a friend, I mean. As more than that-girl-who-lives-across-the-street… Why can't I be the fabulous undeniable beauty who kindly puts up with your antics? Why are you so interested in all these other girls?

They don't know you! They don't know half the things I do. What about the time our neighbor turned into a werewolf! What about the time when I was volunteering at that hospital and Theodore went missing? Do they know about all that? What about on Mother's Day when you went in search of a mom to pair Dave up with so you wouldn't feel left out? You hate being left out. You hate not getting attention

When you share those kinds of memories with someone… it means something. Was I the only one who read that issue of _Today's Girl? _What am I saying?! You never read!

When you look at me I want you to see everything that we could be… everything we already are… There's a reason that when I'm having a problem… a problem I can't talk about with my sisters… there's a reason I automatically go to you. There's a reason we have such a connection… when we can just glance at each other and know what the others thinking. Sure, that's one of the reasons why we're so competitive but… I've never had a better opponent.

I mean… you're actually smart when you want to be! It takes serious skill to come up with some of the excuses you've gotten away with. You have a special _charm_ about you that draws people in… and at once they either love you or think you're just plain annoying.

You know what I mean.

You're always the first person to challenge whatever I'm saying… whether I'm right (I usual am) or wrong… your face is always in mine… and the next thing I know we're yelling and screaming about something that doesn't even matter anymore.

You drive me crazy!

It's just like that song by that other Brittany girl.

I can't sleep… and when I do… I dream of you… like all the time… for some weird reason I CANNOT get that stupid red baseball cap out of my head. And I want you to notice how I feel already. It's like… we're playing a game but I don't know the rules. So I'm jumping all over the place hoping to gain some points but I just can't. And you're over there with that idiotic grin plastered on your face like there's something funny about the whole situation.

It's not funny.

How can I tell you how I feel when you make me feel like this?!

I don't talk about my feelings! I yell them! I scream them! But I've never actually talked about them. And I keep trying to do that with you but it's not working. Nothing is ever easy with you is it? You always have to make things harder than they need to be.

You're the only one who does that to me. Who makes me feel like … I would do- I would do anything to be anything to you. Anything more than a friend… Anything more than a rival…

Just let me know.

Just let me know me know what I need to do.

I sound like I'm begging now. I never beg.

Whatever.

It's not like I'm afraid to tell you. I'm not afraid of anything.

So fine…

I'll tell you.

But I swear… you better not laugh.

"I love you"

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Thanks so much to **xKawaii-Angelx **for the last line. One line can make ALL the difference.

And don't forget to review!! She just proved it! You're comments help me all the time! And I get inspired from the simplest things. You never know...

So give me your thoughts on this piece. :D


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